He happens

Okay, okay... maybe this isn't my story to tell. But I just want to say that God's amazing about knowing your needs. I have this lovely friend who was telling me about what God said to her the other day.

It was at a prayer meeting - the kind you've probably all been to or can well imagine. And here she was, feeling entirely out of it and asking God what had gone wrong. BM loves him so she wasn't too happy about status quo. Understandable.

And then God happened :). Like he sits her down in the middle of the meeting and in her completely silent spirit He tells her so she can hear: 'You know what? I invented doughnuts!' See, doughnuts are a favourite and she needed to laugh and she needed to see the person of God again to heal her stupid disconnect.

God happens.

Like I was biking through a barrier that I hadn't been able to pass, for nearly every day a month, without stopping and walking through or irrepairably falling from my bike! And I was having a really hard day. I was scared of my supervisors. So inadequate with everything. I hadn't had a brilliant meeting with the profs. And I had no idea what to do. I didn't know where the next day was coming from...

And it was raining. Conveniently. So the road was pretty empty and I was pretty broken. I cried. The tears sort of poured. And I figured - whatever, no one would know if they were tears or rain. I was crying a bit like the biblical Hannah too - and the random couple of passers-by looked, only to see me quickly shut my mouth and open again in a loud hum as if I were in the middle of song! And soon I arrived at the famous bike barrier.

And God says: 'Don't fall'.

Gobsmacked, I just sorta gasped and said 'Oh wow, thanks, Lord! You've just made my day so much better'. Obviously I didn't mean it at all, and I knew He knew. And I was sorta madly glad. So I carried on: 'I can't even cross this silly bike barrier without falling and you want me to do a DPhil and settle in and work?! And now you just... I dunno if I didn't know you better, it almost sounds like you're rubbing it in... But I trust you. And if you want me to learn another lesson today, then I know I probably need it'.

And God says again: 'Don't fall'. Quite clearly.

So I cast up a look at him, not in anger but more like a weepy-read-my-eyes-look, and hit the pedal.

And cross that barrier perfectly without stopping or slowing down for the first time in my life. I have never fallen since, with my eyes on Him.

And then God explained... 'cos He figured I was gonna take some time to work this one out... "Phil 4:13. You can do all things through Christ who gives you strength. You can do it but as long as it's my strength. Always. Keep your eyes on me. And you really can do it."

I didn't stop crying as I rode back in the rain. But I couldn't stop smiling either. Or laughing.