My theories on Romance - one gripe

I have quite a few theories and this is just one gripe. Hehe... as you would expect! I don't quite like the expression 'falling in love' in that it seems to signify spatio-temporal dimensions I don't want to relate to that feeling. But there's nothing quite like it in that it refers to an experience that is nowhere near matched by the ideas conveyed by 'attracted' or 'liking', much less, to me at least, those associated with going out or seeing someone or being boyfriend and girlfriend. Tommy Tenney wrote that God wasn't looking for a girlfriend that he could date, he wanted a love who would prepare to be his bride. That is the relationship we try to mirror in our relationships here on the planet as we know it.

One of my questions is this - surely it is not one of the ten commandments? 'Thou shalt not be unmarried?' Many Christians seem to find it incomprehensible that a girl might not seek marriage pro-actively. Yes, I said it - I am a girl, and I am not seeking it pro-actively. Not because I am afraid or abnormal! But because I do not see a way of logically concluding that that is God's desire for everyone. Many times the Bible says the opposite - that it is not. Possibly because in that day and this, there were several well-meaning persons who came up to singles and told them off for not letting themselves get married. Trust me - I am not pro-actively against it either. And trust me - if the right guy happened, I don't think I could stop it if I tried. But that's just it - I stubbornly (for now ;O!) refuse to try. God does the match-making, I believe. And being Indian, I must add this clause - He does the matchmaking whoever He chooses to use. This has recently been very frustrating to me. But if it's frustrating to me, when all I am faced with are teasing jokes and advice to start thinking about it, then it must be scream-worthy to some of my older friends who have complained that that is all some people can think about conversing about with them. Being single is not equal to being an object of pity and commiseration, neither is it equal to being in adversity while everyone advises you to get out of it. If you're married, you were single at some point too? And God chose to bring you into the world and keep you single until a decent age - for a good reason.

What I do not understand is how married people don't get that if they had to choose between a person God did not intend for them, a person who's not their spouse now and being single, how the heck would they have even given it a second thought???!!! Either there is God's perfect will or there isn't - it's the deal with perfection. I've said this before - this does not mean you look for perfection in the person you're marrying. If that were the case, then I know now without having to wait for an answer, that that is not going to be me. So you don't decide to get married and then look for the guy. (Again it might sound like it, but I am not against arranged marriages. I am entirely for!) You only want marriage when something happens to change your present state. Either you fall in loe with someone - hard ;) - or God tells you different.

So I do't get why people want to make the lives of my friends who are in their late twenties harder. Or why they want to annoy the sanity out of me with their insistence of rightness. It is an India thin - and I am not sure how one deals with the nonsense!